The Beginning...

Ok, so its about two weeks until my life changes forever and I am so very excited...it has been a long journey to get to this point and I am so looking forward to this change. Since I was a little girl, probably about 10 years old, I dreamed of having a "normal" body....or at least one that looked like my tall, beautiful, slender older sister. But little did I know that it would be many many years before this dream would even be close to being realized. After a couple decades of personal work to really get to know and love myself and accept myself for the Ally I am, I am finally able to work on the outer shell of my being. It has seriously been an inside to outside process, one of many trials and tears, sorrows and heartache....but definitely worth it. I would not trade the "learning" I have done as a result of this personal "battle", my weight and Identity as "Allison" despite it.

I find myself preoccupied with my surgery, thinking of it from when I wake until I go to bed. I cannot wait to run again, no just wait, I can't wait to walk more than 5 minutes without feeling tired! I can't wait to ride a bike again and go white-watter rafting with my son for his 9th birthday...I can't wait to feel the breeze through my hair again while horseback riding with Ruthie...I cannot wait to go to a restaurant or movie theatre or concert hall without serious anxiety over the seating and whether or not I will fit!!! So many things I have missed out on...soon to be shared and experienced...

Anyway, I am basically packed for the trip to Utica, NY, so I could leave at a moment's notice if I had to! I have all my post-op medications, my special diet requirements, comfy clothes etc...I've even been eating "birdseed" for the past three weeks and I am feeling great!!!! My pre-op diet has actually been a pleasure...shocking, I know, but it's true...I suppose it's means to an end...so far I have lost almost a total of 30lbs....and it's only going to getter better from here...